Hate, the kind of hate that i consider my life

so yeah i say daily how i hate my life, i think everyone does on one level or another, there are just those things i wish i could but i can't no matter what i think is right.

Jennie is pulling away more and more. It's like a daily thing it would be like one of those profit graphs that showed high profit in the thousands and now the graph spikes at the bottom of 2. i drew a picture to represent how i feel. She thinks i'm the women in the relationship since i think it's important to talk about things and express who we feel, but she'd rather clam up and hate everyone for nothing.

and we'll fall beneath, at the back of my heart

and fail to breath, until we resurface again

- Dear hunter -

Feel free to use this graph i have created in your own desription of hate.

Been a while

Almost a week i think since i posted last, i kinda fell out of rythem with posting here since there's only one who reads,

i am almost finished painting the car, i'll have pics up later this week, my allergies are finally starting to relax, pollen season is passing thank god for small favors. Painting the car has been a huge undertaking seeing as all the runs and fish eyes that i've had to work out. The paint im using is different then i'm used to and it goes on extremely wet and wants to run the second it hits the car, so you just have to work with it.

I painted most of the trim and got it ready for the car as well. so it'll all be back together sooner then later. I ended up buying the car from the guy, i was just going to trade him, but i paid him the 300 over the last couple months, so i'm going to finish the car and then sell it for about 3,000. pay off more of are rent seeing as i didnt do my studie. i just didnt feel up to it. Funny enough he was buying all the paint and supplies so really i just paid him back for the stuff he bought for the car.

The day goes on

allergie attack agian, it sucks big time. Not much to say, day goes by, allergies flare up, i feel like shit and then i go home to Jen. Who can be rather grouchy. Today she is sick, and wishes i was home to take car of her, but im not. pluggin away at the puter.

If you get the chance look up the song Smiling Swine, by The Dear Hunter, great stuff, there new cd is coming out, hopefully i can get a ripped version of it.

i gagged on a hotdog

well i wouldnt say gagged, more like choked eating a hotdog for lunch today, gotta chew that shit better. The family went Strawberry picking, it was cool. spent about 20 dollars in strawberrys and had a great time. pics - I hate how zac thinks he needs to be funny in every single picture i take. it really pisses me off that he cant just be in the photo, that he needs to over act a simple fucking picture. yeah he's 7 still.

sapt

thats right sapt, did you know i wear heaing aids? there old and they are out of adjustment but i wear them every so often, i dont hear the consinites (sp?) in a word. or atleast i dont hear them well. So i say what? alot and can you say that agian? not because i cant hear you, but because i cant tell what your saying half the damn time.

There really sensitive as well, i can hear someone stapling there paperwork like 3 offices down, it's so loud sometimes, if i had to hear half the shit all the rest of you ahve to hear and put up with i would go crazy. It's nice to just hear the ringing of my own ears and not the clacking of the key board, or clicking of all the mouses.

i laid her down on the bedsheets of broken glass

^^^ lyrics from a new song i've started, lots of inspiration these days. I found a band called "The Dear Hunter", man good stuff thats for sure. We'll theres only 2 people who visit this, Jen dosent even read this at all nor the friends on myspace i've sent links to. So i'm jsut talking to my self.

3:00 rolls around and i swear i'm fighting sleep. Everyday at that time, it's crazy, i could put my head down on my desk and fall asleep. if only for a moment.

i suck at lyrics and they where an embrassment to have up so i removed them.

Round 2

i finished most of the body work, and i sanded all the cancer (Rust) off the car, so here it is, couple more weeks and she'll be finished.